Minding Benji (Sweethearts of Jubilee Springs Book 5) Page 5

  As for everyone being happy and getting what they wanted, Prudence doubted it. Austin was the one in control of all their fates it would seem, and without speaking to him, the outcome for Benji and her rested in the balance. She left Winnie with Benji and went to look for Minna. Maybe she could shed some light on what lay ahead.

  She found Minna at the back door to the rear of the kitchen, giving out food parcels to some children who were lined up in a neat little row.

  “Ah, Prudence, help me hand these out, will you.” She pointed to a stack of neatly wrapped parcels on the counter.

  Prudence did as she was asked and wondered how early in the day Minna had to rise to do all of this. With the two of them handing out the food, they were soon finished. They waved goodbye to the sounds of grateful little voices offering blessings and good fortune with joyous laughter as they left the two women standing in the doorway.

  Prudence’s gaze traveled to Pastor Jeffrey, talking to Winnie’s husband standing beside their wagon, and wondered how much longer he would be. She needed to talk to him, find out if she needed to be packing Benji and her belongings and heading for pastures new.

  Minna followed her gaze. “I suppose you're wondering what happened last night with Austin?” Minna asked, staring out in the direction of her husband.

  “Well, yes I am. Benji needs stability, and if I can’t find that for him here, I’ll have to go someplace else.”

  Minna cleared her throat. “It didn’t go well with Austin by the sounds of things.”

  “Oh.” Prudence felt her face drop. Her head followed. She knew it, it was too good to be true. To find a handsome, single man of means and ready for marriage was too much, too soon. She should have known better than to get her hopes up. But she hadn’t allowed for his true dislike of children, and that had to be taken into consideration.

  “Oh, don’t give up hope. Jeffrey said it was his fault he never got around to telling Austin it was just a temporary thing until Benji’s father comes back for him. Once that’s cleared up, everything should be fine.”

  “But I don’t know if my looking after Benji is as temporary as you say. My brother didn’t give me an exact date for collecting his son, and I haven’t seen him for over a year. He didn’t even have the decency to bring the child to me himself. I could have Benji for years, and if that's the case I don’t think I’d want to give him back. Would you?”

  “I see…mmm, I don’t suppose I would. I’m sure we have options. Let’s wait until Jeffrey comes inside. I’ll fix you some breakfast.” Minna led Prudence back into the kitchen.

  Chapter 9

  “You do know Jeffrey’s right. The men in this town are hungry for a female companion. You’d do well to listen and marry that girl. It’s not as if you’ve got much time left. What do you have against children anyway?” Johnny B asked, leaning his chair back and balancing it on two legs, his hands behind his head.

  “I don’t have a thing against little ones. I just don’t want the responsibility of having to care for one,” Austin said from the doorway, his back against the frame.

  “But isn’t that the woman’s job? What would you need to do?”

  “It’s complicated. Just know I have my reasons.” Austin scratched his chin, then folded his arms across his chest.

  “Well, let’s hope those reasons can find you somewhere to live on the sixth of July. If you can’t find a wife before them, you know as well as I do, that gives you a little over four days to reach a decision.”

  “I’ll cross that bridge when I come to it.” Austin sighed and knocked his heel against the hardwood floor of Johnny B’s office

  “Seems to me you’d better cross that bridge soon, before it blows up in your face. I didn’t get where I am today by letting opportunity pass me by.”

  Austin harrumphed. “Remind me never to come to you when I need advice. You’re not very good at it.”

  “You mean I don’t tell you the things you want to hear. If you’re not going to marry her, let me know. I might mosey on down to the church and take a look at her myself.” Johnny B laughed.

  Austin felt his face harden and his teeth grind against each other. A growl left the pit of his stomach. “Stay away,” he said, through clenched teeth.

  He couldn’t understand why Johnny’s words affected him so much. Hadn’t he been standing in the office of the livery for the past fifteen minutes telling him the many empty reasons why he didn’t want to be tied to Prudence Fairchild?

  Each excuse, one by one, had been tossed aside by the man sitting in front of him. Yet the thought of her marrying someone else bothered him more than he cared to admit.

  Johnny B raised his hand in defense. “All right, cowboy, steady your horse. I was joking. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have work to do.” Johnny B shuffled the papers on his desk for emphasis.

  Irked that Johnny should dismiss him so readily and before he had the chance to storm out, and slam the door behind him, did little to improve his constitution. Angrily he made his way to his horse. He should go home and cool off, but he needed to speak to his brother.

  For all his candor about being able to sleep well, he’d tossed and turned all night long. He kept seeing that look of defiance in her murky eyes and the fullness of her lips as she moistened them. He had to admit, her boldness intrigued him. Standing there, her chest heaving, blatant in her stance, claiming to be the child’s mother and unmarried.

  Was he supposed to just accept that without question? He was a hypocrite he knew. There were many reasons a young woman could have a child and not be married. The one that sprung to his mind, said more about him and his own behavior than anyone else’s

  He was not a virtuous man, never claimed to be one, and hadn’t been for a long time. Why then was he expecting to be gifted with a woman without questionable morals? Although she hadn’t seemed morally inept, quite the opposite.

  Austin steered his horse along Schoolhouse Road, past the boardinghouse and along the street, blind to the beauty of the scenery around him—until he reached the bakery. The delicious smells made his stomach rumbled, reminding him he hadn’t eaten all day.

  The leisurely pace in which he traveled down the street had evened his temper somewhat. He dismounted when he was close enough to the bakery, hitching his horse to a post, and went inside. He’d buy some pastries as a peace offering to his brother and figure out a way to move forward. He needed a replacement for Miss Fairchild, and soon.

  That little boy needs a proper father, not him.

  He wasn’t fit to be anyone’s father. He hadn’t told Johnny B the real reason he didn’t want children—that he was scared. If anyone could understand his fears, it would be Jeffrey. His fears were real and they haunted his dreams most nights. He knew this day would come, but he wasn’t ready for it.

  From all accounts, he had the face of his mother, but the temperament of his useless father, or what his uncle Ed said of his father, after he’d abandoned his children to his brother’s care. Austin remembered the few times his father came to visit after drifting around for years. He never stayed long, and he never looked at him.

  Austin didn’t want to be that way to another living soul, but it was in him.

  He wasn’t like Jeffrey, full of heavenly love for all mankind, he was hotheaded and ruthless when he needed to be. He’d often wondered if forgiveness was even in his nature. His own father never forgave him for the loss of his wife, blaming him for something outside of his control. It wasn’t like he’d asked to be born. But still his father would look at him with loathing whenever Austin caught his eye.

  Throughout the years, Austin believed his father’s treatment of him had blackened his heart. It didn’t matter to him how much his uncle and brother loved him, he’d been looking for love from a person incapable of giving it to him. He’d seen no sign of himself changing up to this point in his life.

  If for whatever reason he should grow to resent his wife, and he could think of a few, it would be per
manent. He wouldn’t want to raise a child around that. Would Jeffrey become like Uncle Ed and have to raise his children for him, because he couldn’t bear to look at them?

  The scent of rose water drowned his senses as he stood thinking in the bakery, undecided what pastries to buy. He’d know that smell anywhere. He’d gone home with it on his clothes the night before. Or had it just been in his mind? He didn’t know which, but it kept him awake and now the scent filled the store.

  He turned to face her, his gaze sweeping the length of her body before resting on her face. Her presence unnerved him. His heart raced and his thoughts became scrambled. What was she doing in here? Did she see him come in and follow him, in the hope of getting him to change his mind?

  Jeffrey must have told her by now the wedding was off. His rejection of her hadn’t seemed to faze her in any way. The way she looked at him now showed no signs of the discomfort he felt from seeing her.

  He’d hope to avoid her by catching Jeffrey in church. He was there every morning until midday, then back again late afternoon. She smiled at him, his heart missed a beat and the collar of his shirt seemed to tighten around his neck, cutting off his airway. He tipped his hat.

  “Miss Fairchild.”

  “Mr. Alwin, nice to see you.”

  Did he detect a note of sarcasm in her response to him? He couldn’t be sure, her face unyielding, her eyes blank in their regard of him. He swallowed hard to remove the lump in his throat.

  “Likewise,” he said, moving toward her, he took her hand and raised it to his lips on impulse. Then shrunk from the tell-tale smile, which widened at his gesture. “I stopped by the bakery to buy some pastries.”

  “As did I.” She moved closer to the counter and the cabinet display, removing her gloves and admiring the presentation of the array of sweets.

  “Well, there’s no point us both buying baked goods. Why don’t you point out what you’d like, and I’ll purchase them, then we can walk back to the house together.” He rested his hand in the small of her back and guided her over to the shelf he’d been looking at before she’d arrived.

  There was no way of avoiding her now, he’d get the cakes and take her home, then leave as fast as his horse could carry him. There was something bewitching about this woman, and he refused to allow himself to succumb to her charms.

  Chapter 10

  Balancing two boxes, one containing a light, fluffy chocolate cake and the other lemon, Austin leaned forward and opened the bakery door for Prudence to proceed him.

  “It’s very warm today, don’t you think?” she asked, opening her parasol, and just missing his eye as she cast it over her shoulder like a fishing pole. He tilted his head backward away from her assault, grasping a firmer hold of the boxes in his hand.

  If he didn’t know any better, he’d have sworn she’d done it deliberately. She spun around to face him, seeking an answer to her question, judging from the arch of her brow. He freed his horse’s reins and said, “Can’t say I’ve noticed.”

  Austin didn’t know where the heat to his skin originated. The one thing he was sure of, the weather had nothing to do with it. He held himself back from stiffening up, when she took his arm as casually as she pleased, almost as though she had a right to, and was planning to brand him like livestock.

  Oh, she was good. Was this how she trapped that poor child's father? He wanted to ask her, but didn’t know how to bring up the subject without sounding judgmental. “How’s the little one?” He decided he’d ease into it.

  “He’s doing well, even better now that Winnie’s here.” She smiled, placing the lethal weapon she held in her other hand, as she tucked her arm under his. He had to duck out of the way as she then tried to place the parasol over their shoulders, and let it fall between them while she grappled with her purse. Her touch was making him giddy. He needed to concentrate.

  “Winnie?”

  “Yes, Winnie, she’s the woman who wet nursed Benji for me, when we were in Denver. She and her husband have come to Jubilee Springs looking for work.”

  “You’re not feeding him yourself?” Austin arched his brow in surprise.

  “I do, if I make up his formula. But I think the milk from a wet nurse is much healthier for him. Wouldn’t you agree?”

  “I can’t say I’ve given it much thought. That’s women’s business.” The conversation just got awkward.

  “Maybe.” She sighed, pausing her stride to fold down the parasol and slip the loop over her wrist.

  Austin was grateful for the pause, it gave him the chance to say sorry and change the conversation.

  “I should apologize for my abrupt behavior last night. The child came as a bit of a shock. One I wasn’t expecting, as I’d made my feelings clear on the matter.” He raised his hand holding the reins and stuck his finger into his shirt collar in a failed attempt to loosen it.

  “Think nothing of it. It wasn’t as if I didn’t know the terms of our arrangement. Benji was a surprise to me too.”

  A surprise. How could she not know she was pregnant? The child had to be at least two, maybe three months old. Or was she speaking figuratively? That was it. She must mean she was surprised when she found out she was pregnant.

  I bet it was.

  “Where’s the boy’s father?”

  “I have no idea. I haven’t seen him for over a year. He promised to come back for us when he was settled.”

  “He just abandoned you both?” Austin felt the pressure of his blood pumping through his veins, and concentrating at the side of his forehead. He could feel the vein at the side of his head throbbing. The thought of the child’s father just leaving them both in such a way—to fend for themselves like strays—angered him. No wonder she wasn’t about to wait for the scoundrel.

  “I guess you could call it that.”

  Her voice pulled him from his musings. He looked at her with new eyes. How brave. She must have been taken in by him, then left like a pair of old worn out boots by the wayside. She didn’t seem to bear any ill effect from what must have been an awful ordeal. She’d had to face people, carrying her shame like a coat of arms and wait for a promise to be fulfilled by a worthless weasel.

  He had to be fair to her, she appeared to have given the unprincipled devil a year of her life to set things right, which in his opinion, was longer than he deserved.

  Then again, was he any better than the child’s father. Wasn’t he planning to do the same thing?

  “Sorry, what was that?” He gazed at her in confusion, unsure if he’d heard her right. His attention had been drawn away by his thoughts, then by the sight of Steve Kelly, the manager of the sawmill, standing in front of the church with his brother.

  It looked as if Jeffrey was taking a delivery of timber. He hadn’t realized they’d gone this far. It felt as if he’d only been in her company a few minutes. What was Kelly doing there? His gaze drifted back to the other man and his brother as she repeated herself. This time he was listening.

  “I said, I have some savings, so I can give you your expenses back. Winnie says Mrs. Millard will be bringing brides to town tomorrow, and I can find myself a husband with these woman at the planned social Friday night. So you are free of your obligation to me.”

  Austin whipped his head around and looked down at her. Was she giving him a way out of marrying her? Who asked her to? He hadn’t made up his mind yet what he was going to do, and when he did he’d do the telling.

  “I don’t want my money back.”

  “But I thought—”

  “I know what you thought. Jeffrey is waving us over. We should go see what he wants.” Austin didn’t want to discuss this any further and was thankful for his brother’s interruption. She’d voiced what he’d been saying and thinking since the night before. But somehow hearing the words on her lips made him feel ashamed.

  “Austin, Miss Fairchild.” Jeffrey greeted them as they came closer. “Ah, Miss Fairchild, may I introduce you to Mr. Steve Kelly, he's the manager of the sawmill he
re in town.”

  “Good day, ma’am,” Steve said, wiping sweat from his brow and neck with a large handkerchief.

  “Hello, Steve, what are you doing here?” Austin asked, not liking the gleam dancing in his brother’s eyes as he introduced Kelly to Prudence. Was he planning to carry out his threat right here in front of him? He wouldn’t dare—would he? Sometimes, he’d swear he didn’t know his brother at all.

  “Oh, Steve’s here to help me build a few more benches for the picnic on Sunday and maybe a new room for the house. I’m expecting a lodger any day now. I may even extend the church from the money I’ll be getting soon.” Jeffrey grinned at him.

  Austin drew his brows together, his eyes forming slits as he let them drift over his brother’s face. Jeffrey’s meaning wasn’t lost on him.

  So it was like that, was it dear brother?

  Just then, another man came out of the church, pulling off a pair of work gloves, and wiping his forehead with his sleeve. Did Jeffrey really have a pool of men under the pulpit? So, Jeffrey was testing Austin’s resolve.

  “Ah, Jacob, come met my brother. Austin, this is Jacob Dunne, he and his wife have just arrived from Denver. He’s looking for ranch work, but if you don’t have anything, Steve has said they’re hiring at the sawmill.”

  Austin exhaled and released his horse to graze on the grass in front of the church and took Jacob’s hand. So, he was the husband of the woman Prudence spoke of. That was a welcome relief. His only competition was the wandering-eye-wolf, Steve Kelly, with his Irish accent and rugged good looks. He hadn’t taken his eyes off Prudence since they’d arrived.

  “Miss Fairchild, is it?”

  Prudence nodded.

  Austin felt his temperature rise, he knew where Kelly was going with his questioning. Before he could speak, the other man continued, “Would you think it forward of me to ask if you’re being courted by anyone—”